A 'snakehead' a day ...
Scripps Howard News Service
The Chesapeake Bay has a problem, and soon you will, too, unless residents in that area can eat a certain species of invasive fish into extinction -- the snakehead. These fish are as ugly as their name sounds, and while they will eat anything, not much will eat them.
Snakeheads have mouths full of nasty teeth, grow to nearly 4 feet long and 15 pounds, and proliferate like crazy. They're native to China and Korea, but turned up in the Washington area only a few years ago when they were discovered in a Maryland pond.
If they don't like their surroundings, they slither overland to more desirable venues, which is evidently how they wound up in the Potomac River and in the Chesapeake.
Environmentalists hope that restaurant patrons will -- if not eat snakeheads out of existence -- at least gnaw them down to manageable numbers. It's proving a tough sell.
The Chinese claim great curative powers for snakehead soup, but the Chinese brand has been rather sullied because they claim magical benefits from all sorts of disgusting food products -- rhino horn, bear paws, shark fins.
American law prohibits deceptive and dishonest medicinal claims, which pretty much bars the most effective means of eliminating this unwanted fish: "A snakehead a day will make you as randy as a teenager. Rediscover the magic of adolescent hormones through the magic of snakeheads."
Maybe we could enlist Michelle Obama to insist that a tasty slice of snakehead should be part of every nutritious school lunch. Or we could do it the good, old-fashioned American way and serve it to the troops and disaster victims, two groups who don't really have a choice.