So there's this gay couple that lives in the neighborhood. Well, I don't really know for a fact that they're gay; it's not like I've ever asked them, or seen them embracing in the street or anything. It's just that ... ah ...

Never mind.

Anyway. I often see them out walking their two little dogs, poodles or schnauzers or something in between. Occasionally, they saunter down our street while I'm out chasing the 2-year-old around the yard. The 2-year-old is very much in favor of dogs, so he has to go down and say hello. The dogs are always very friendly. So, in fact, are the owners; we make a bit of small talk, and they comment on how cute my son is. And if you want to get on my good side, the quickest way to do so is to tell me how cute my son is.

Then they go on their way, and I think to myself: I'm supposed to be threatened by these people? Because if you listen to a certain segment of society, they are a threat. These people, gay people, are trying to undermine the family. My family. And I should do something about it, lest they somehow win the right to marry or form some sort of civil union; then my family will really be at risk.

How my family would be at risk generally isn't explained. I guess it's supposed to be self-explanatory. And I suppose it is, if you live in a world where you don't actually know any gay people, which permits you to entertain the notion that they're all out there pushing some sort of "agenda,'' that they have some sort of secret desire to see marriages and families destroyed so they can undermine society and GAIN CONTROL OF THE WORLD HAHAHAHAHAHA ....

But wait. My neighbors don't seem to have any sort of discernable agenda. They just seem to be, well, neighbors. And good neighbors at that. They always clean up after their little dogs. Would that I could say the same thing about all the heterosexuals in the neighborhood.

So for the life of me, I can't see how permitting these two people to marry, if that's what they wanted to do, threatens me or my neighborhood in any way.

I can understand that some people don't believe it's right, don't want society to sanction something they believe has been outright prohibited by their faith.

But I wonder how it is that we as a society can tell a certain group that while they must assume all of the responsibilities of citizenship, they are not permitted to enjoy all the rights of citizenship. To me, that's hypocritical.

Second, so much of the campaign against homosexual marriage is based on this assertion that permitting gays to marry somehow undermines the family, a claim which I perceive to be disingenuous at best, downright dishonest at worst.

Are "regular'' marriages somehow null and void if the right is extended to gay citizens? If in fact you think that, I'd say your marriage is on pretty shaky ground to begin with.

Will it somehow make marriage less appealing to subsequent generations? Doubtful. The institution has endured war, pestilence and famine, and is a testament to the human desire for companionship and the necessity of stable relationships in which to raise children and solidify communities.

There are those who might say that defining marriage as being between one man and one woman is inherent to marriage as this sort of public pillar, but I don't believe that. For if heterosexual marriage were the shining beacon we make it out to be, no marriage would ever end in divorce, no families would ever be shattered. More important, then, than the gender of those involved is the commitment of those involved, a commitment to one another that ultimately translates into a commitment to the community as a whole.

Because I look at this gay couple in my neighborhood, and I think that they are a pillar of the community, one of many upon which the community itself is elevated.

Frankly, my community, and yours, needs as many pillars as it can get. blog comments powered by Disqus