So, have you heard about the Botox backlash?
Women with strangely smooth faces that can't move, puffy lips and bizarrely large chests that look like they've been stuffed with basketballs aren't getting as much work in Hollywood these days.
The complaint? They look like freaks, not real women.
Um, how long did it take all you casting agents, producers and directors to figure that out?
In an article in this Sunday's New York Times, Laura M. Holson wrote, "In small but significant numbers, filmmakers and casting executives are beginning to re-examine Hollywood's attitude toward breast implants, Botox, collagen-injected lips and all manner of plastic surgery."
Much has been made of the fact that casting agents for the new "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie said only women with real breasts should show up for auditions.
Seems women with DDD chests and size 0 bodies were kind of rare back when pirates sailed the seas.
But real breasts? Does any woman in Hollywood have them?
The article quotes Shawn Levy, the director of "Date Night," who said, "To walk into a casting session looking false hurts one's chances."
Problem is, your typical Hollywood actress looks false. If she really looks real, that hurts her chances even more.
This new attitude about plastic surgery isn't about taking off the pressure for women to be perfect, it's really just about the carnival-freak edges.
Hollywood has its own definitions of freaky.
A woman with a little meat on her bones being the star of a romantic comedy that is not about her being fat?
No way. Too freaky.
And a movie where a woman's looks aren't important? Or her age doesn't matter? Or her brain is actually more interesting than her body?
I know. Way, way too freaky.
I'll never forget when I saw "About Schmidt," staring Jack Nicholson as a man facing 65 and retirement.
It was a great movie, and Nicholson was fantastic.
But I almost fell out of my seat when I saw his wife, a woman who actually looked 65.
I was truly shocked. I thought it was his mother.
I'd been brainwashed.
(Don't worry though. The wife dies early on.)
No, Hollywood doesn't want real, natural looking women. The New York Times article said well done plastic surgery was still quite fine.
The thing is, somewhere along the way, with actresses opting for more surgery at younger ages, and more and more women turning into Cher and Meg Ryan, it got kind of creepy.
Maybe a director realized that Nicole Kidman hasn't changed her expression in five years, or that all actresses in Hollywood are beginning to look a lot alike.
So, is this a moment to rejoice?
Well, in the take what you can get world, I suppose it is.
Hollywood is actually looking for women who can move their faces and emote!
They actually want women who look like human beings, not computer generated characters!
Hey, it's a start. Maybe next, we will actually see a wrinkle on screen.