Kathy Robb laughs as she explains how she started dating her husband, Matt Good.

"My lesbian lover suggested it," she says.

No, it's not as kinky as it sounds. Back in 2001, Robb was playing half of a lesbian couple in "Falsettos," at the Ephrata Performing Arts Center and her co-star, Anita Lewis, told her she thought she and Good would make a nice couple.

The two knew each other, but that push got them started dating.

Being half of a theater couple can be pretty strange. You watch your beloved kissing another, turn into other people and become so obsessed with the show, your regular life disappears.

Danielle Marsh remembers when she and her now-husband, Jeff Marsh, had just started dating. He was playing Thomas Jefferson in EPAC's "1776," and had to passionately kiss the actress playing his new wife, Martha.

"It was difficult to see, a weird, out-of-body thing," she remembers. "I was pretty young then and we had just started dating, but it was tough."

The two couples are part of EPAC's new show, "The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee," which opened Thursday night.

VIDEO: EPAC's "The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee:" Selected scenes and commentary

Good is directing and Robb plays Miss Peretti, a former winner whose life still revolves around the spelling bee.

Danielle Marsh is Olive, one of the contestants who has few friends and finds an emotional outlet in being able to spell well.

Her husband plays Douglas Panch, the vice principal, who's wrangled into participating in the bee, which he's not happy about.

"He's a little sadistic, he likes to see kids crumble," says Marsh. "But he has a passion for Kathy's character, Miss Peretti."

Speaking of passion, theater romances happen a lot.

When Marsh notes that they met during a show ("A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum"), he jokes, "Doesn't every EPAC couple?"

A common interest in the theater can fuel a relationship. So can the close quarters.

"I was full force," says Mrs. Marsh with a laugh. "I thought, that guy is so cute. I pursued him. I don't think we would have dated if we weren't in a show together."

Theater marriages can be especially tough when one spouse is a director and the other is an actor.

A while back, Robb introduced her husband to the show "The Last Five Years," and they planned to do a workshop performance of it at EPAC.

But then the show got on the mainstage schedule, with Good directing.

Robb was pretty confident she'd get the lead role, in fact, her husband told her the odds were good.

But he was auditioning other actresses and ended up casting Julie Connors, who, coincidence would have it, played Martha Jefferson in "1776.".

"I was very upset," Robb says. "It was tough but we talked through it and Julie was wonderful in the show."

"I've moved back home," Good says with a smile.

"I really do have to earn the part," says Robb. "I don't want people to think I got it because I'm the director's wife. But auditioning for Matt makes me so nervous. My voice breaks, my knees get shaky. I think it's like auditioning in front of your parents. They're your biggest fans, but they make you nervous."

Being in a show can be all-consuming and when you both are, forget about it.

"Right now, we refuse to have anybody over to our house," says Good with a laugh. "You can hunt wildlife in our backyard. We haven't done anything."

"It's a really odd compromise," says Mrs. Marsh. "You do a show because you want to be together, but then you don't have any time."

"I sent Kathy an e-mail the other day telling her I missed her," says Good, who admits he gets obsessive and difficult when he's directing a show.

"I get pretty miserable to live with," he says. "I obsess about everything."

Rehearsal is the toughest time. Things will get better once they're actually performing.

"It becomes a lot more fun," says Mrs. Marsh. "We can go home and talk to each other about how the show went."

It's especially exciting for them to be doing this show. They saw it when they were on their honeymoon and fell in love with it.

"The 25th Annual Putnam County

Spelling Bee"

Cont. through May 8

Wed.-Sat. 8 p.m. (And 2 p.m. May 8)

$25-$27 adults

$22-$24 seniors and students

Ephrata Playhouse in the Park

320 Cocalico St.

Ephrata Community Park, 733-7966

ephrataperformingartscenter...