"There is no getting away from how heartbreaking this is for everyone," the Lancaster County judge said Friday.
"I don't have the words to console you," Judge Margaret Miller told the families sitting in the spectator section of her courtroom.
One family's son was dead, the other's son was standing before her awaiting sentencing.
Jeremiah Eisenhower and Thomas Sensenig were best friends. In January, a car in which they were riding crashed into a utility pole.
Police said Sensenig was driving on Cherry Hill Road, just north of Route 741 in Paradise Township, when he crested a hill and suddenly came upon a horse-drawn buggy.
He swerved to avoid hitting the buggy, police said, but struck a utility pole and ended up in a cornfield.
Eisenhower, 25, of Gordonville, a passenger in the vehicle, was pronounced dead at the scene.
Sensenig, now 26, of Kinzers, was uninjured, but he was charged with homicide by vehicle. He pleaded guilty in August.
On Friday, Miller sentenced Sensenig to 9 months' house arrest plus 5 years' probation, saying she based her decision mostly on a letter from Eisenhower's parents asking her not to send Sensenig to jail.
"There's not enough words to say I'm sorry," Sensenig said, turning and looking at the Eisenhowers before he was sentenced.
"I can't say I'm sorry enough."
Defense attorney Robert Beyer said his client "will be living in the prison he created for himself the rest of his life."
Sensenig has an excellent work history and continues to receive counseling, Beyer said.
Most important, Beyer said, was the "incredible, absolutely staggering amount of forgiveness of the Eisenhower family" since the accident, including inviting Sensenig to sit with them at their son's funeral and thanking him for being their son's friend.
"I am ever in awe of the power of forgiveness that our community can demonstrate," Miller said.
"It seems to me that I can best serve the victim's family by doing what they have asked of me," she added, and not impose a prison sentence.
Assistant District Attorney Todd Brown suggested that Sensenig be placed on house arrest as part of the sentence, noting that as "tragic as the circumstances may be," Sensenig was driving recklessly that night, causing him to lose control of his vehicle.
In addition to house arrest and probation, Miller ordered Sensenig to pay $8,239 restitution and $250 in fines for three motor vehicle violations.
Sensenig also was ordered to perform 250 hours of community service.
After the proceeding, outside the courtroom, Eisenhower's parents quietly embraced Sensenig and his family.