The funeral is over, the flowers have been placed and the obituary has run, but many teens have found that grief doesn't end so quickly.

Some use social networking Web sites, like MySpace and Facebook, to connect with others who share the same loss.

"I think you can get (feelings) out through something like Facebook a lot quicker," because of the instant communication, said Frank Lee, who created a Facebook group to mourn Hempfield High School science teacher Jeff Way.

Way died unexpectedly in November at age 42. The memorial page, "In Dedication and Remembrance to Mr. Way," had more than 2,100 members as of late May.

"I think it was a great way for people to talk about memories and the great things Mr. Way did as a teacher and a mentor," Lee said.

Krista Albright, a junior at Lampeter-Strasburg High School, used a Facebook group to share memories of her friend, Ryan Weitzel.

"I know that I will never forget Ryan and the struggles he went through, but sometimes you have to let go of the bad memories … ," she said. "I need to see him like he was usually. He was always smiling, had awesome hair, loved playing lacrosse."

Weitzel, a senior at Lampeter-Strasburg High School, died of cancer in April. He was diagnosed with malignant melanoma in 2003 and given six months to live but fought for five years and inspired many people around him.

"Everyone in my school, including me, (is) going through a rough time," Albright said. "Some people didn't know Ryan as well as I did, and some did. Ryan and I were great friends, and I will always remember him."

The online groups also let people who aren't directly connected to the deceased join in support of those who are grieving. One Solanco High School student, who only knew about Weitzel from television reports, posted a comment on the group "We're With you Whitey!!!!!"

Kelly Mankin wrote: "I could NEVER imagine what it is like to go through high school knowing that you have cancer and you don't have long to stay on this earth. He seemed like such a strong and amazing guy, walking through the hallways with his different and bright colored shoes making everyone smile even though he was weak: that never stopped him. I will be praying for his family, friends, and everyone else (whose) lives were touched by him. God bless to his friends and family."

Two Facebook groups commemorate Weitzel's life. As of late May, "We're With you Whitey!!!!!" had 923 members, and "Ryan Weitzel. We love you still. RIP 4/12/08" had 527.

"The most common challenge that people face is that they feel very alone," Patti Homan, a grief counselor at Hospice of Lancaster County's PATHways Center for Grief & Loss, said. "When you realize that you're not as alone as you think you are, it can be a reassurance."

Homan said that teenagers shouldn't wait until grief becomes overwhelming to seek support, either online or in traditional groups.

"I certainly feel the online chats can be very useful," Homan said, but face-to-face contact also has value.

However, teenagers are often reluctant to seek counseling and support when they grieve because they don't want to be seen as different, Homan said.

Homan's literature on grief suggests sharing memories and feelings and creating a kind of tribute to the deceased even after the traditional funeral rituals are over. That could come in the form of a poem, a donation to a charity or an online memorial.

Grief is a different process for each person, Homan said, and some people will feel the need to share their feelings for longer than others.

Over the six months that have passed since Way's death, face-to-face conversations at Hempfield about him have tapered off, Lee said. Still, some students have continued to post memories and tributes to their teacher. Some set up a prayer group through Facebook.

"Certain people just share one memory," Lee said, while others have participated in discussions on raising money for the family Way left behind and possibly naming something at the high school in his honor.

Lee said the group provided a needed forum for grieving students.

"It was a safe haven for people to go to just for Mr. Way," he said. "I'm pretty sure other people would have made the group if I hadn't."

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